"I've never been shy, but now, I’m honestly calling that judgment into question. Lately I find it hard to find things to say to people I don’t know. Shyness is a strange thing. It makes no sense to me. I have plenty of friends. I'm very talkative. I understand that it’s no big deal to go and spring up a conversation with someone. Find something you have in common with them. Don’t analyze it, just do it. Blah blah blah. It’s not my mind, not my conscious that has a problem with it. It’s my body. I can’t control those butterflies, those unexplainable moments of hesitation, self doubt, and moments of total abyss (where the mind goes blank and the mouth goes “duuhhh…”). No matter how much I hate them, no matter how much I try to ignore them, they almost always win.
Maybe its just my sleep issues that are causing this anxiety. Maybe what I’m dealing with is normal, and my mind’s just so distraught with exhaustion that every little problem is amplified ten fold. I’m not sure, but I find an empty solace in discovering the source, and the supposed solution to one of my new problems. Insomnia."
Are you living in my head? Did you kick out my conscious and move in?
I always admired you and your outlook on life. You've always been so understanding and intriguing. I never knew that you and I shared a mind.
Take that bus over here. You're due for a visit.
<3
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Of course i remember.
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